Mapping #5 and Updates Courtesy of the Truly Fab Facebook Status

So funny that when things seem to be progressing the most quickly is also when I have the least amount of time to devote to blogging. I have so much to catch up on since I haven't been able to blog much recently, and yet, the cochlear implant awaits no blog. The progress this little computer in my head and I are making together has made everyday an exciting experience lately.

I will start off by saying that my fourth mapping (mentioned in my last post) that was supposed to sustain me at least seven weeks was just not cutting it a week later. I had maxed it out and was completely ready to take on an even bigger range of sound. I made an appointment on May 7th, my fortieth birthday (yes, yes, 40 is the new 30 and all that jazz...), for another session with my audiologist. Michelle is just the greatest at squeezing me in spur of the moment and allowing me advance at my own pace instead of going by the book. I adore her for that, and I'm sure I would not have made nearly as much progress without all the time she has put in creating new maps for me and here I was just five weeks out ready for my fifth mapping!

My mapping session was the highlight of my birthday. (Thank you, Michelle!) James was on his fifth day in the ICU at the time, and getting a new tune up with TONS of power was a great gift on an otherwise pretty gloomy day. Even taking Aidan to the park later that evening to visit the ducks was a bust as he was exhausted from daycare and missing his daddy. He threw a temper tantrum on the grass worthy of an Oscar before collapsing in my arms crying and asking for his dad. Whew. Some days this mom business just isn't a walk in the park (pun intended.)

So, Michelle increased my range of sound almost to the point of distortion, but she stopped short of that, of course. I had pushed her for something I could work my way up to in the next few weeks, and she was worried that I would leave with something too loud for comfort. However, every time I've left her office with something that seemed loud, my brain would adjust to it quickly, so I had no fear of the great big booming world. My tolerance for louder programs increases even more when I put my hearing aid on my left ear, and when we work on the mappings, I don't put it on until we are wrapping up.

I was given four new programs on my processor. They were for using everyday, filtering out background noise, focusing directly on a speaker (anything or anyone I can look at directly), or listening to music. This would be more for music in a very quiet environment or with an Ipod. Michelle also said it would be good for listening to nature and birds.

Each program has nine different volume levels. I've maxed this sucker out....again....(level nine, baby!) and am trying to refrain from going back for a new mapping right away to give Michelle a little space to actually see her other clients. The only thing is that now that I'm at maximum level and comfortable with it, I'm hearing a lot of background static that is making me batty. It's like radio static on a station that is just barely out of range.

One area of improvement has been a surprise. Music is getting better all the time, even though some people seem to prefer the music they heard prior to the CI with their hearing aids. The high pitched notes on the Faith Hill song I always listen to for comparison after mappings and as the weeks pass are actually the sounds of a guitar. It makes so much sense now.

Music used to have depth for me with my hearing aids, but it was a one dimensional depth. I couldn't isolate different sounds as I'm starting to do now. I could usually hear very basically how the tune sounded, but I couldn't pick out any of the details, especially those sounds in the higher frequencies, and I had no idea how much I was missing.

I asked James recently about different sounds I was hearing in the background when we were in the car, and he'd tell me what he thought it was. Once it was a brass instrument, another time I heard something distinct it was a piano, and another time it was a guitar. Voice clarity, at least, is as good as it was with both hearing aids with a little more oomph added now (meaning if I know a song and have memorized the words, I can usually follow if the voice is easy to distinguish from the music), but I know that comprehension and clarity will probably be my biggest hurdle to cross eventually whether it's by spoken word or song.

I started watching this season of American Idol with two hearing aids, then I only had one after surgery, and by the finale I was rocking out with a screaming toddler and a cochlear implant. I was able to appreciate the voices of both finalists a little more fully by the finale than I would have a few months ago. One guy was a full blast glam rocker/power ballad singer and the other was the simple yet creative song writer/singer usually sporting a guitar. Both had God given talents that I could enjoy with my brand new God given bionic hearing.

I would have been happy with either guy winning based on talent alone. The sad part was the viewers and the media who tried to turn it into a culture war with neither fan base looking too hot, but that's a blog post for another day. (I will say that the grown up friendship between Adam Lambert and Kris Allen AND their families speaks volumes in itself about the respect those two guys and their families have for each other. *heart melting*)

One thought that keeps crossing my mind lately is that I have not a clue how hearing people can handle so much noise commotion at one time. However, I keep thinking about what if I were blind and not deaf? What if I was able to see by some miracle? The kaleidoscope of the summer landscape in our neighborhood, while wonderful to see for the first time, would have to be incredibly overwhelming to take in all at once. I can label a tree, a cloud, birds, a garbage truck, a child on a bicycle, a wagon in the yard, and a rooftop on a house, but if I had never truly seen before what would I make of all of that? Would it all just jumble together visually as sounds seem to do for me now? That is how I try to view my situation and keep my perspective when I feel a bit impatient. I cannot fully understand how it is to process this maddening world of sounds just yet, but I learn something new everyday. I can only imagine a blind person learning to see would also have to spend time deciphering that information just like I'm trying to do now with a cochlear implant.

So here's my idea of updating my progress since my last mapping on my birthday... I'm copying the relevant Facebook status messages from my profile since the last tune up. :-D Clever, eh? On that note thank God for Facebook, or I wouldn't know what I was thinking at 11:00 pm three months ago. Gosh, how have we lived without this glorious technology all these years? *insert slight sarcasm and a big smile*

....and now for the status updates....

Michelle talked to her extremely in denial hard-of-hearing big brother on the phone last night without an interpreter or captions and didn't do any worse than he did... Okay, that's not saying much... but a month later we've gone from bats n bells in the belfry to talking on the phone...kind of... Score one for the bionic ear. Boo for tuning me in to two year old tantrums in high definition though. May 12 at 11:40pm

This was a major triumph for me! The conversation with Dean was pretty simple, but it was great practice for me. I was able to do this by turning my processor to the telephone switch and maxing out the volume.

I also had a couple of other phone conversations with my "adopted" mom in Tennessee. She's very soft spoken but is clear and enunciates well. She was excited we were having the conversation sans interpreter and captions. I still use my video phone, with interpreter, for most calls because the clarity isn't quite there and even having a simple conversation requires a lot of concentration at this point, but I'll get there!

I think the biggest issue with speech is probably understanding consonants. Vowels, I can pick up pretty well, and my brain usually works extra hard taking those vowels and tying them in with the few consonants I might catch, the sentence structure/number of syllables, to the topic at hand to piece it all together. That requires a lot of tiring brain work, but I haven't had a real conversation on the phone like these calls in a long long time. It was just awesome to even be on the phone and comprehend anything at all, much less with 10-20 minute conversations.

Michelle is quite amused by her two year old waving to her from his high chair saying, "hi baby!"May 14 at 9:55pm

Mostly posting this because the kid is a hoot! However, I didn't have to ask my husband what he said because I understood him myself. I did clarify this statement with James though because I keep thinking I misunderstood something Aidan said. "Did he really say 'hi babe'?!" I have a hard time believing that I understand the odd little comments a two year old will make. Funny thing?? I seem to understand whatever James understands Aidan to say. It seems almost any time I ask James to repeat something Aidan just said now, he usually doesn't understand it either!!! Amazing? I think so. Thank you, God for my bionic ear and my silly child!

Michelle: Oh, you chirpy little birds are so loud.... I haven't heard you since I was a kid... and never in high def like this... Thanks for stopping by today... even though I have a feeling you've been there for a long time. :-P May 15 at 6:20pm

This was a super duper red letter day for me! Seriously! We have birds... lots and lots of birds in our 'hood. Who knew??? Not me! I cannot get enough of listening to the beautiful music they make. If the television is off and no one is talking, I can even hear them in my living room as I sit on the couch. Wow! Truly this is a gift.

Granny and I used to listen to birds on her back porch when I was much younger. I'd forgotten what it was like to hear their singing, and even as a child I didn't hear them quite this well, but my grandmother would tell me what to listen for as we sat out there quietly looking up towards the trees and the sky. Now I am telling my son to listen for the birds when we are outside which kind of chokes me up a bit. *sigh*

I slide my magnet off and on when I sit outside to remind myself not to take this for granted and to remember just a few weeks ago I would not have been able to enjoy this. With just my hearing aid on, all I can hear outside is the low buzz of the air conditioner, and the quiet sound of my husband's voice. He's a loud guy, and we have loud birds. I love my new outside world.

Michelle's startling hearing moment of the day: hubby's cell phone... across the house.... while the TV was on... I couldn't hear that thing ring if I sat on top of it two months ago. Dude! :-P May 17 at 12:22am

Oh my gosh... oh my gosh.... OH. MY. GOSH! James' cell phone has a cute little ring tone. I was on the computer one night, and over the sounds from the television in another room, I heard very very clearly his phone ringing as if it were in the room right beside me. Holy cow! Un-freakin'-believable! I couldn't hear that thing ring...ever.... before! I always thought it must be the quietest ring that required super duper listening skills. Not at all. It's quite loud. Seriously, this is my husband... super duper listening skills??? *said affectionately*

Michelle's bionic moment of the day: hearing something from the living room while the TV was on... hmmm... is it??? *venturing to bathroom to look* ... why yes, the sink water is running while hubby is brushing his teeth. Can I get a woot? :-D May 17 at 9:02pm

This was another shocking moment for me. Running sink water?? Over the TV? I'm the chick that can leave the water running right in front of my face and not have a clue. Of course I can't blame that completely on being deaf, since I know I can just be scatterbrained period. This was just too cool. Had lots of cheesy woots from friends on FB!

A runner up moment of the day that didn't make my status report but I included in the comment section reads: ".... listening to different bird calls in the back yard and actually being able to find two of the birds I was listening to on my fence "talking" to each other... I knew it was them because I could beak read them... seriously... ;-)" I do sometimes try to locate the birds I hear now if they are visible and not hidden in the trees.

Michelle has spent an hour frantically looking for her lost CI processor only to find it ..*whistling* (now, don't tell anybody this...) ... behind her ear... sad... just sad... May 18 at 11:00am

What kind of a ding dong am I? Like I said... nothing to do with being deaf... just naturally absent minded on occasion. I had this sucker on... magnet and all and the only reason I "found" it is because I finally stopped searching and stood in the living room puzzled, scratching my head...thus locating the darned thing. It wasn't turned on though if that makes me any less of a ding dong! ;-)

Michelle had lunch on the patio of Joe's Crabshack.... listened to the music on the speakers.... placed orders for hubby and herself as she carried on conversation with waiter with no repetition necessary.... (and did I mention the restaurant faces the freeway???) Today's bionic moment is brought to you by the makers of Nucleus Freedom... :-D May 19 at 3:26pm

Now THIS is what it's all about, people! Multi-tasking listening skills sorting themselves out... so, so, so fabulously cool! Yes, I had to lipread the waiter as I placed the order, but I could hear him clearly over the noise of the freeway and music as well. I could hear the music clearly separate from the traffic. I carried on a conversation with my husband without strain in spite of the music and traffic. It was really awesome to have him home from the hospital after a long stay and much healthier than he had been in months while enjoying a nice grown up lunch outside and knowing what was going on around me. At this point, I'd just been activated about 6 weeks.

Michelle's bionic moment of the day.... (you've been sitting on the edge of your seat waiting for one, right?! ;-) ....hearing the little Thomas the Train chugging in place on the couch wasting a battery over the sound of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on TV... (had to turn the TV sound off to actually locate the little bugger though...) Thomas lives to roam off tracks around the big world of our living room another day. Fri 8:18pm (May 22)

Oh the things I can hear now and all the batteries it may save on toys in the future hopefully! I can actually relate to the parents that have to listen to the racket of multiple toys going haywire simultaneously now. I know every bionic moment won't be puppy dogs, rainbows, and Audubon musicals, and that's okay!

My friend, Melissa, asked me if there is anything I didn't like to hear at this point... my response: "LOL!!!!!!!!!! Ummm.. quite a few! let's start with the screaming demon... (2 year old piercing tantrums hurt).... and all the static coming in from the craziest stuff like the refrigerator humming... only it sounds like static when I'm not next to it and I can hear it over music or the TV... (I've turned off the TV and followed the sound to the kitchen and the static turns into the fridge or dishwasher humming) or when we go outside and the bird symphony is joined by the AC... there was a cricket I was trying to hear but my neighbor's AC clicked on and drowned that out (also sounds like static)... oh... and when paper is crinkled or packages or opened by others when I'm in the car, by the TV (I promise I don't watch that much TV.. LOL!).. whoa... it is loud and sounds like it's tearing right in my ear (like James opening ice cream cones or bags of popcorn)... Phoebe (our cat) was playing with a plastic bag next to the computer and that was very crispy loud and startling...")

I'll end with this moment from yesterday, though I only heard about it second hand. My guys humor me. Life with a two year old at it's finest:

Michelle's laugh of the day.... When Aidan's daddy came home from the store he opened a bag and asked Aidan if he wanted some candy. Aidan's response? "Money? Two dollars?" (no, kid... it's free... you're two... where do you come up with this stuff??) 10:39pm

Mapping #4, Gonna Fly Now!

So much has been going on in my life and with my implant in the last few weeks that I'm a little bummed I didn't try to blog along the way to catch the small stuff. However the illness I mentioned was my husband's and required a long hospitalization, but he's home and on his way to recovery now. We are blessed that he doing so much better. If you are the praying type, we would appreciate if you would add James' continued recovery to your prayer list.

Even though my attention was really elsewhere, I've made quite a bit of progress recently with my implant, and I'm really excited. I made some notes after mapping #4 (April 28) so I can probably summarize the day pretty easily, but it's the days after that I wish I had kept more notes on. However, I can hit the highlights of that particular big day... the day I felt like I'd finally run up my own gazillion steps and could see the future a little more clearly.

The day began with one of Houston's infamous floods that subsided quickly, but it was a big mess on this Tuesday. Many schools and businesses were closed for the day. I had made arrangements for Aidan to go to daycare and was hoping both the daycare and the HERF (Hearing Ear and Research Foundation) office would be open so I could get this mapping done. I was ready because the mapping I had at the time was feeling very limited, and I was ready for a big tune up! Luckily the roads were passable where I was going and both places were indeed open.

When I met with my audiologist, Michelle, we went into detail discussing what was going on. I told her I was just a little frustrated by how sloooow my progress was, and then I would mention, "oh by the way, I can hear if Aidan is crying or laughing through a closed door at nap time" (which kept me from opening the door if he wasn't and distracting him) or I would say, "oh, and by the way, I heard the rain outside my window and then I heard the rat a tat tat sound of the rain when I opened the back door" (as opposed to the steady roar with my hearing aid.) Finally after a few "oh by the ways" she just looked at me and told me I was just an outside the box case, and that my progress for my type and history of loss was really nothing to sneeze at which made me feel better. I told her that I've always felt "outside the box" when it came to my hearing loss because I could compensate (*cough* fake) my way through anything, but with the cochlear implant it was kicking my booty! (can't believe I just said "booty"... is that more PG than "butt"?..probably not..) After a pep talk from her, I was feeling much better. I swear my audiologist is like a special ed teacher that inspires her students to graduate with honors. ***Insert Rocky theme song here***

Michelle did four progressive maps, each slightly louder than the other for me to work my way through. She also told me normally I'd come back in the 3 months for the next appointment but since I was going to see my family in Tennessee in June for a wedding, she was willing to do a mapping 7 weeks later before I left and do the different types of programs including the one for music.

She tested with beeps. I'd raise my hand as I heard the beeps. I got hard to test like I always do because my ears start ringing as soon as I hear high pitches and play tricks on me straight through testing. However, she did a neural test as well, and the computer did all the work checking out my brain's reaction to sounds. I really need to research that further to understand how that happens. I just loved that I had to do nothing. My neural test closely matched my beep test, so I didn't look like a total clown. Those two tests were used to create my mappings.

Michelle pulled out papers and a box and started rifling through them and WOW, was everything LOUD! I was fine with it though. I wanted the boost, but it was something of a shock and it wasn't like it was going to cause more nerve damage. *smile* We did a booth test after that, and it was just amazing how much I could hear. Of course I'm referring to beeps and whistles and such, not speech. There's still a long way to go, but my brain is processing this information well.

As I was leaving the building I noticed how the world seemed more "open" and more sounds were coming through. When I got to the car, I played the Faith Hill song I always play after mappings or whenever I turn up my processor. I was able to turn my map up to the third program already and tolerate it fine. The sound was amazing. It was much more like listening with my hearing aid, but with the added benefit of high pitched frequencies and instruments I could almost pluck out of the to complement what I was hearing in the left ear with my hearing aid. Even starting the car, hearing the music, and the traffic on the freeway while paying the lady at the toll booth as I was exiting the hospital was liberating and not even too overwhelming. This is the day I finally saw the potential in my cochlear implant and truly became excited.

I picked up Aidan and took him to the library to get some new books to read at bed time. He ran to the toddler section and the noise level was crazy loud. I looked around, but no one was even reacting. I thought libraries were quieter???? Of course toddlers with puzzles and puppets aren't going to be little angels, but I really did not know how loud the kid section of the library is. However some child started banging on metal shelves, and Aidan walked over and copied that child. Before I could pull him away the librarian was on MY case about my child. Hey, it was the other kid, lady. Sheesh. (Okay, my kid isn't blameless... but still. ;-)

That evening, I watched American Idol going back and forth between my third and fourth mappings. Just a few hours later and I had maxed out my new mappings. I did have to adjust to Aidan rolling his car on an end table while I was watching tv. That was startling and annoying (especially when he would be at his loudest any time anyone was singing. How does he know these things? He has uncanny timing.) Hearing him talk was even crazier. In the car I easily knew when he was talking. It was almost like he was sitting right beside me and not in the back seat with the windows down. This was a great day.

More updates to follow on another post.... :) I'm not done yet.

Stay Tuned

I know I've taken a break from my blog recently. I have a lot to share soon. After mapping #4, everyday has been a new adventure in listening as opposed to just the torture of bells and whistles with an occasional recognizable sound before that mapping. I'm hearing more speech, more environmental sounds, and most importantly understanding my son so much better. I have a long way to go, but I like where I am now because I see the potential, and it is liberating. Of course at the end of the day, I take it all off and just relax. Sometimes silence is the best sound of all, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I'll check in soon. Due to my son's second birthday last weekend and now an illness in my immediate family, I've been otherwise preoccupied. I appreciate the emails and support I've received from friends and family.

I'd also like to thank again those who donated to my friend Melissa's March for Babies fundraiser. She went over her goal by $50 ($350 total!) and walked 5 miles on the day of the walk. Her son just started walking himself. *sniff* What a long way he's come since he was born two months early. I'm so proud of him and his mom!

Take care and see you soon,

Michelle

March of Dimes Walk

A dear friend of mine is walking this Sunday for March of Dimes. She has an incredibly modest goal of $300 to reach in the next four days.

I met Melissa, very begrudgingly, when my principal asked me to take a deaf education student teacher from a local university for the spring semester several years ago. I asked if I had any say in the matter and he said no, so the rest is history. Thank God for Dr. Michel. I made one of the best friends a girl could ever have!

Melissa and I have shared so many ups and downs through the years... our scales (she'll forgive me for that one if one of you makes a small donation)... our dating lives.... our engagements.... our weddings... and our pregnancies.

Most of our life experiences we shared around the same time periods which made for a great support system in each other. However, Melissa became pregnant just before my son was born, and it seemed like her son was here in no time after I had Aidan. Gregory, very unexpectedly, made his appearance 8 weeks early. He was a preemie, and no one saw it coming. His family was very anxious. He was in NICU on Christmas Day (and Melissa couldn't even touch him), and in the hospital for several weeks following. He was also in isolation at home for several months once he finally came home. Today he is a very happy thriving little toddler who is into everything. Pure joy is the best way to describe him.

There are the angel babies that are no longer with us that this walk also represents. Rudy is the son of my friend, Dannette, (a former Miss Deaf Texas and a current bi-bi pre-K teacher) who went to heaven after only 28 days on this earth. He was a fighter but he was too early. Dannette has just been blessed with the happy news that she is expecting three years later, and she is due on Rudy's original due date, December 21st. (I had goosebumps when she told me that.)

My friend, Kara, is someone I've reconnected to from high school, and I've actually gotten to know her better now than I ever knew her then. Her beautiful daughter, Bailey, was born stillborn 5 years ago at 39 weeks.

March of Dimes can make a difference in someone's life that you know. A small donation goes a long way. If you can make even a $5 donation, I'm sure Melissa would be thrilled. It's the little things in life that make her happy. She has no idea I'm writing this, so I hope she forgives me for not telling her first. xoxo

Thank you in advance to anyone who has even taken the time to read this, and a big heartfelt thank you to anyone that might consider making a donation to help Melissa reach her goal in the next four days. Remember it is tax deductible!

Drip Drip!

It was a dark and rainy night. No scratch that.... It was a dark and rainy afternoon. The kind where an almost two year old valiantly fought an afternoon nap in the next room, passing prison time slowly pulling out each individual sheet of the big jumbo pack of new wipes accidentally left in his crib (when he realized that all other antics for freedom had failed.) The cats curled up under the desk snoozing away, while I escaped the morning madness that is Mickey Mouse and choo choo trains by spending some time online. When lo and behold, what noise was that yonder invading my right ear space? No, it wasn't the rat-a-tat-tat-tat of the computer keys that I'm getting used to lately. This was different. This is *peering out window to confirm*... yes, this is the sound of raindrops on the roof. Holy cow. Awesome! This is a sound I can say with absolute certainty, I can only hear in the bionic ear when I'm inside the house.

Well, crazy times like this call for venturing to the back door and standing by the rain to listen...(I'm not feeling it enough to actually stand in it and spin around, holding daisies, while my hair is drenched cover girl style from the rain.) I can easily hear it with both ears, but it is such a different sound with each one one. With the hearing aid it has more of a calming roar. With the implant, it sounded more like a pattern with a constant drip drip sound. I think I need to go back to the door and take more notes.

Also that child in the next room had an early release and needs some monitoring (and NOT for good behavior... the warden just couldn't take it anymore!)

I've Got Ears, Say Cheers!

I'm just past two weeks since the first mapping, and slowly but surely, things are starting to look up! Last night James and I took Aidan to see Disney on Ice at Reliant Stadium in Houston. Aidan loves Mickey Mouse and all of his friends, so we knew that would be so much fun to watch the magic for the first time through his eyes. Meanwhile the show was very loud on my new "ear", but the noise didn't bother me any more than it normally would have in the pre-CI days. I had the setting on the next to loudest program (P3), but I thought it was at the highest at the time(P4), which is where I normally wear it during the day now.

I couldn't help but think how, even though the show is very visual, there is also a story being told and music playing that would require hearing to appreciate. Younger children with hearing loss will miss out on some of the excitement because of that unless Disney makes some accommodations I don't know about? I did wish I could follow along a little better last night, but I was so taken in by Aidan's pure joy with all things Disney, it was quickly forgotten.

Aidan loved the show and was spellbound with skating fish and lobster, the vibrant lighting and sound effects, and especially the Mickey and co. sightings between the acts. He was so calm and well behaved all the way through intermission. (Wow, have I ever said Aidan, calm, and well-behaved all in the same sentence before?) He sat on his dad's lap for a while and then reached out and asked for me. Awww... coming from his royal wildness, that was a special treat, and I enjoyed every last snuggly minute!

We let him burn some energy during intermission, and meanwhile, I loaded up on cokes, popcorn and cotton candy that came with the absolute must have item of the night, a yellow fish hat. (Mind you, we'd already had a cheeseburger, fries and a snowball in a fish mug.) The second half of the show started feeling a bit long for an almost two year old that was stuffing fistfuls of cotton candy in his mouth as fast as he could pull it out of the bag. He became somewhat restless and antsy, and I could finally show James, with absolutely no doubt, that late night sugar for our kiddo will create a monster. Of course I bought said sugar that created said monster, but did I mention we saw Mickey Mouse live and in person???

On the way home James had to make a quick stop to pick up his truck at work, so I waited in the car for a few minutes. Aidan was out for the count in his car seat. I decided to listen to a CD with my processor minus my hearing aid. The CD is one of Faith Hill's older CDs that I had years ago. I just bought it at Half Priced Books since I had several songs memorized I could use for listening practice. I was surprised to listen to Breathe and actually separate her voice from the music. It wasn't crystal clear, but it was something new. I could easily follow along with the song knowing it so well, but I couldn't have done that with my processor alone two weeks ago.

When we drove home, I continued to listen to the CD. This time I had the car engine running and my hearing aid on in my left ear. All the same, I noticed something big, something different I hadn't connected with before that moment. The "noise" in my right ear had become the high frequencies of the song I was listening to and it sounded like a (hold it....are you ready for this... wait...just wait...) PLEASANT (yes, I said pleasant!!!) tinkling of music that matched what I was hearing in my left ear. The two sounds were like matching bubble gum pink to fuchsia, definitely in the same family but oh so different. I can't hear what I'm hearing in my right ear with the implant on the left side with my hearing aid, but at the same time my implant has a long way to go before it catches up to what I can do with a hearing aid. (Why do I feel like I need to explain this, like I'm having an affair with my right ear and cheating on my left ear?)

Since last night I've heard music on the television in passing with the high frequency tinkling in my right ear that matched what I was hearing on the left side in the lower frequencies. Muy cool! Also, I've noticed almost overnight that speech on television is becoming more clear to me. Aidan and I watched Babe this afternoon, and I took off my hearing aid to listen for a few minutes. Words sounded like they were echoing, yet with the captions on I could easily match what I was reading to what I was hearing.... easily. Whew. Slowly but surely. This is definitely better than I had hoped for even a week ago at this point. I'm looking forward to my next mapping!

A Little Lost on Easter Sunday

Today, my husband, son, and I went to Easter service at Houston Second Baptist in Katy. I was so excited about getting everyone dressed up, out the door, dropped off (although I felt so bad that Aidan boo-hooed buckets as we left him in the nursery) and to the service on time. What I was not expecting to find is that the service is no longer interpreted in sign language. The Spanish interpretation is still there, but where did the deaf crowd go? I admit that I teared up when I asked where the interpreters were and was told by a very nice man, who looked so disappointed to be the one to tell me, that sign language interpreting wasn't available for that service anymore. What the heck? I kind of felt like, in the moment, I was being tested to see if I could take the news on such a wonderful Holy day like a champ. Of course that made it worse because I was quickly wiping the tears as we sat down. Debby Downer arrives to the pews in a timely manner. *sigh*

I was really bummed at first, but then I thought maybe I could use the time to practice my listening skills. I knew I wouldn't understand much but every little bit of practice helps. Really, all there was to do was to make lemonade out of lemons at this point. James was obviously feeling bad for me, and I felt bad that he felt bad. I am too much of a novice with my implant to say I got a lot out of the service, but the songs from today were ones I've known for years. I miss my grandmother, especially at Easter, and the hymns were comforting and familiar and made me feel nostalgic for another time.

Before the service started after the singing, the room went dark, and there were loud booms, which were special effects that sounded like thunder (I'm pretty sure that is what it was supposed to be) and a narrative that unfolded around the story of Jesus' resurrection. Also, the main points were displayed in writing on the screens. It was very much like briefly being in a theater for an action movie with the compelling voice narrating (all I can tell you is that it was a deep male voice, but I would've known that with just my hearing aid) and loud theatrical sound effects.

The service was too complicated for me to follow. I could only catch a few words or phrases here and there as Dr. Young worked the stage. This was his televised sermon, and the cameras surround the stage, so he can pretty much move all over the stage, and he did. We sat behind the orchestra and had an up close view of all the frenzied, exciting action that goes on in the pit. There are also a lot of overhead television screens at Second Baptist that show the service as it is taking place and also includes the verses being read or the songs being sang which is really cool for someone that needs a little visual information.

After the service we made our way back to the nursery. Aidan was in a class solely for May 2007 babies. You know it's a big church when his class is only for 23 month old kiddos! I wonder if they celebrate all the birthdays in May? Aidan had some artwork for us, which included a butterfly and a cross he'd "colored" for us. I was already mentally deciding where on the fridge I was going to place them and what was going to have to go to make room for them. He was very happy to see us, and of course we were thrilled to see him. Have I mentioned how much I love my little angel with his lopsided halo?

We went out to eat at Red Lobster after church. At this point Aidan was tired (read: hyperactive, kicking, just a real pleasure. ;-) We knew it was a lost cause when the crackers were tossed all over the floor and table, and he was upset he was not allowed to "play" (throw, toss, hail Mary) with the (breakable) bread plates. James was still a little uncomfortable from the family picture a waitress took for us because Aidan chose that moment to kick his dad in the unmentionables as I held him. I must say as horrible as I felt for James, the picture itself is classic, a lovely blooper caught on camera to remember for years to come. Yes, I must figure out how to post the picture, which includes James' stunned "I've been maimed" expression, while Aidan completely turned his head away from the camera. We called it a day and took our lunches to go.

Maybe next year Aidan will make it through church and lunch. Last year his grandfather preached his last Easter service before retiring, and I had to take chatty Aidan outside for the service (small church and no nursery) but we made it through dinner at Luby's with the family afterwards. As for this year, we all went home, watched a little Micky Mouse, had lunch and took naps. Actually, I waited until James and Aidan were both asleep to break out my crab legs and shrimp while watching a DVRed episode of General Hospital from last week....THEN I took a nap... not too shabby! When all was said and done, I think I preferred my couch for lunch today.

Anyway, I really do hope we can find a Baptist or non-denominational church in Houston that we really like as a family (and is not such a long drive) and has interpreted services. There's a deaf church in Houston, but it's about thirty minutes or more from our house. I'd like to find something closer to our community so we can be more involved than just for a Sunday visit. I also hope God will forgive me for my gloomy mood earlier today because my life has been extremely blessed, even when things don't go as planned once in a while. Today is really about the ultimate gift God gave us. Everything else is secondary.

Hope you all had most fabulous Easter! :)